This morning I sat down to try and see through the intensely painful feelings that keep coming up, disproportionate to anything that’s actually happening to me. What came out in the cards is a movement from 6 to 7, from strict hierarchical control to organic merge of aspects that is more than the sum of its parts. I feel like this is speaking to the sum of ancestral experiences attached to DNA, the complex of experiences that make up my biological identity outside of my personality.
I don’t really want to be tied to this ancestral trauma, but I know I kind of volunteered for it. It’s mess that I don’t want to acknowledge or heal because it feels unfair. But for some reason, for the first time, I did this reading on the green spiral hooked rug that was made by one of my paternal Acadian ancestors. They came back to Nova Scotia after being dispossessed and deported during the Grand Dérangement, the Acadian diaspora.
I don’t exactly know how to proceed, but the cards give clues. “Trust the mystery and appreciate the gifts conveyed through this DNA lineage. Know that it is a process, a dance, both down into darkness and up into great light and perspective. You have the strength and authority to go through. These are Earth lessons that complete a much larger journey. It’s natural to be homesick—just remember you’re held at every step, even if it doesn’t feel like it.”
(Decks: Starcodes Astro Oracle, Spirit Animal Oracle, Mystic Shaman Oracle, Sacred Forest Oracle, Starseed Oracle)